Caring For Ourselves In The Chaos

Yesterday I went for a snowy, early morning walk in Santa Fe and this is the writing that came through. To me, this is resilient activism. This is the incredible invitation that stands in front of us all. We aren’t meant to shrink and disappear as the world becomes more chaotic. That chaos is asking us to witness it through the wrinkled face of experience with the mischievous eyes of a child. I can’t even imagine what answers and solutions await us when we stand fully in all our gifts, wisdom and truth.

When the house is on fire, you don’t retreat deeper inside - you throw open the door and run for safety.

20, 30, 40 years from now - I want to look in the mirror and see the eyes of a mischievous, playful child peering back at me through the wrinkles of my aging face. When we meet eye to eye, I want you to know the deep healing I have done in order to stand in front of you sharing both the depth of my experiences, my time in the sun and wind, and also the freedom of childlike wonder.

As a woman in my 50s - I have learned how to adult. I do it well. So I now take the time to sit with experiences from the past and re-write their ending. I am standing strong in my capacity to heal what has happened, to show up as a strong woman for the younger me that didn’t have anywhere to run. I am that safe place for the joy to be rekindled and the fire to be relit. I peer out through young eyes and see that my allies were always there, the trees and water were always welcoming me into their healing wisdom. And so I sit with them today and experience them in a new way. A way that honors that young girl who just wanted to climb and splash. I have become a strong woman who is the safe space for all of the wisdom that has retreated deep below the surface to come forward. I will hold the space for my own gifts, for your gifts, and for the gifts of the more-than-human world. I will embody the maiden, mother and crone all at once because I have walked their paths and know the stories they have held for me. What excites me in this moment is exploring all that I missed through the eyes of a mischievous and playful child.